Friday, February 11, 2011

Exposed!


Recently, I came across this limiting belief that is fascinating to me. It's about being exposed. But not about hiding some inside flaw from being found out by others. It is about keeping the information that we are loved from being exposed even to ourselves.

The belief I came across was along the line of "if we even try to remember we are loved, we are not safe." It blew my mind when I finally understood the full grasp of this thought pattern! Ever felt like a fake? Well, duh, it made sense to me how we could feel that way especially when we don't allow ourselves to remember, let alone, know and embody our own deepest truths.

Incidentally, I was realizing that remembering something is a kind of like exposing what was once hidden in our mind, isn't it? What was buried, hidden or lost in the deep folds of our psyche is now in clear view again.

So, how does this belief manifest as a limitation in our lives?

It can show up as:
  • Feeling unsafe and vulnerable about claiming the right to be who we really are.
  • Feeling vigilant and guarded about life, not fully trusting the flow of the universe and ourselves.
  • Holding ourselves back in important areas of our lives.
  • Limiting how much we allow ourselves to experience our heart's desires (whether it is abundance, health, relationships, inner peace or satisfying work).
  • Sabotaging ourselves, despite our best intentions.

Why not just release this belief and transform it to something that serves us better? A-ha! This is where it gets interesting. I was fascinated to hear so much resistance and rebuttals about why one might need to keep this limiting belief even if it is deeply and widely limiting in one's life. I heard the resistant thoughts within myself as well as others to whom I posed the question, "What keeps you from remembering that you are loved?"
  • I will be a spoiled brat if I remember that I am loved no matter what. (I have to admit, this was what I thought.)
  • We will stop innovating, growing and expanding and eventually fall, like the Ottoman empire. (This is a good one, isn't it?)
  • I would be so cocky in my speech that I wouldn't stop to think that my words might be hurtful until it's too late.
  • Other people will be jealous of me and exclude me.
  • I am not comfortable walking around feeling and knowing that I am loved when so many others don't feel that way. I don't want to be that different or special!
  • I will have to fight others, because they want to convince me that I am not lovable, and I really hate conflict.
  • I don't want to remember I am loved, because when I do then I will also remember that love ends. 
  • If I believed I am loved and that is not my experience, I will feel hopeless. I don't ever want to feel hopeless. (Alternately, you might have the desire to avoid feeling embarrassed. Think about what emotions you prefer not to feel.)

I am sure these are not the only resistant thoughts to this very interesting pattern!

You might uncover your own resistance to remembering that you are indeed loved. Anything come to mind yet? You might have just one, or you might have a list of resistant thoughts. Or you might remember times when love got you in hot water. For example, you might remember when you were treated poorly by those who were jealous of you having the love that they wanted; or the reverse, you treated others poorly because you took the love you had for granted.

If you would like to let go of this story that you are not loved and would like to begin resonating with the belief that you are loved, you can use EFT or TAT to neutralize the resistant thoughts or memories. Honor the old story for how it has served you, and appreciate yourself for being willing to be loved in grace.

It is such a revolutionary and liberating act to expose our own deep truths to ourselves and the world. Can you consider the upside of remembering that you are loved? How would you feel? Who would you be? What would be different in your life? What would you now allow yourself to be, to have and to do that you couldn't before?

Go for it. Expose to yourself that you are loved!

Here’s an EFT script you can use on this topic.

Tap on the Karate Chop point or rub on the Sore Spot as you say the following EFT Setup Statements (please feel free to substitute the words to something that fit you better):

“Even though I am afraid to remember that I am actually loved, it has a lot of repercussions I am not completely happy with, I accept myself and my feelings deeply and completely.”

“Even though it is best if I don’t remember that I am loved, it is also possible that a part of me is inviting me to change my perspective. I wonder if it can be safe and even helpful for me now to remember that I am loved.”


“Even though I am afraid to consider that I am loved, especially after all that happened, I deeply and completely accept who I am without judgment.”


Tap on the indicated EFT points and say the reminder phrases, as suggested below, either aloud or in your mind. You can change the reminder phrases to whatever words that fit you better.

EB: “I am afraid to remember that I am loved.”
SE: “It is not safe to remember that!”
UE: “Best if I forget this whole idea that I am loved. It will only get my hopes up to be dashed down again.”
UN: “It’s better for me and everyone else if we just don’t think about it anymore.”
CH: “What do I get for remembering that I am loved anyway, other than heartaches and unpleasant surprises?”
CB: “I would rather not remember that I am loved. It’s not true for me anyway.”
UA: “Yup, I am not loved. That’s my story and I am sticking to it!”
Gamut point: “I don’t want to remember that I am loved.”
Top of the head: “There is no use in even considering that I am loved!”

2nd round
EB: “Wow, I didn’t know I have strong resistance about believing that I am loved!”
SE: “I must really not enjoy the experiences I had when I thought I was loved.”
UE: “I am sorry that they happened to me.”
UN: “It was sad (or scary, or upsetting, or…)”
CH: “No one knows how hard that was for me. No one knows how that has affected me and my entire life!”
CB: “But it is all in the past now. That is over now.”
UA: “I want to send healing love to my heart, and all other places that still hurt inside.”
Gamut Point: “I choose to send love and healing to all of me right now.”
Top of the Head: “Sending love to all parts of me that hurt. I love you!”  (Tap for as long as you need.)

Positive round
EB: “I love you, (insert your name here)!”
SE: “Yes, I love you!”
UE: “I thank you!”
UN: “Thank you for being here to remind me that I can love myself and that I can send love to all parts of me that hurt and bring healing to them.”
CH: “I am sorry it took me so long to remember that my love is good enough to heal what hurts.”
CB: “I love myself, and my love is good enough for me! I have been looking for love in the wrong places!”
UA: “I am willing to find proof that I am loved instead of just looking for proof that I am not.”
Gamut point: “The Universe has infinite ways to let me know that I am loved and that’s what I want to experience from now on.”
Top of the Head: “It might be fun to look for all the beautiful ways the Universe invites me to notice that I am loved fully, deeply and profoundly! I am looking forward to remembering that I am so loved! And this time, maybe I can even handle this knowledge gracefully!”


Take a deep breath!


This EFT script is provided by Christine Metawati as a good faith effort to expand the use of EFT in the world. It represents her ideas and do not necessarily represent those of Gary Craig or EFT. EFT has yielded remarkable results for many people, but they may not yield the same benefits for everyone. They are definitely NOT meant to replace appropriate medical treatment or mental health therapy. No guarantee of results is either stated or implied. If you use the EFT script provided above, you are advised to take complete responsibility for your emotional and physical well-being. Please consult qualified health practitioners regarding your use of EFT, TAT or any other healing modalities.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Soul Nourishing Practices



We nourish our body with healthy food (hopefully!). You know the feeling of contentment when your belly is full with good and tasty food? How about nourishing our soul, too?

When we nourish our souls, we feel great, fulfilled, happy, alive, vital, eager, energized and inspired.



Here are some of my practices for nourishing my spirit and cultivating my connection with Love:
  • Spend some time, either quietly or loudly, appreciating your life, your home, your work, your clients/friends/coworkers, your family, your health, and yourself. You can do this when you just wake up or when you are about to go to bed. 
  • You can also do a Gratitude Walk, as you walk in nature or out doing your exercises, you can appreciate what you notice along the way. You can create a Gratitude List or even a Gratitude Journal, where you write down all that you are grateful for in your life. This is a great resource to look at to help you resonate again with joy.
  • Think of something that brings a smile on your face. When you are in touch with that good feeling, sense where it is the strongest in your body and allow it to grow easily. Radiate this good feeling to all parts of your body, to your family, to your world and to the Universe. You can send this good feeling to people you have difficulties relating to or you want to forgive, and you will find that this practice can heal these difficulties  in wondrous ways.
  • Do a "Metta" (loving kindness) meditation: say gently to yourself, "May you be in peace...May you be at ease... May you be happy... May you be healthy..." Then, think of someone you love, and say the same thing to that person. And, you can direct this loving kindness energy as often as you want throughout the day and as to many people as you wish.
  • Take 5 minutes to stop and look at the beauty and wonder of life around you. Listen to the birds, look at the flowers, feel the wind, smell the air, taste the rain, observe a bug, bask in the sun, look at the stars... Allow yourself to be enchanted by nature and adore every bit of it! Unconditional love is everywhere, and to feel it, all you need to do is to tune into it!
  • Spend some time to dream Big and Audacious Dreams, just for fun. No need to get attached to results, just let your imagination and heart take flight. Allow yourself to follow your bliss in the direction of your dreams, even if you feel afraid.
  • Play!!! Get in touch with your creativity: draw, paint, write, carve, etc. Allow yourself to be free to get dirty: do some gardening, play in mud, roll down the hills, get covered in paint, etc. Get in touch with your inner child: get on a swing, play hide and seek, or other games that delight you!
  • Laugh a deep belly laugh for the sheer joy of living!

Oh, How Sweet It Is to be Love...

(This article was first published in the February 2008 Metta Center Newsletter.)

It is interesting for me to observe that the more I appreciate, adore and accept all of life, the sweeter I find life and the more loved I feel.

Of course, it feels so counter-intuitive to feel loved when I am the one doing the loving.  But, here in lies the wisdom of love - when you give it freely, without expecting anything in return, you receive it in return. I believe that when we love, we feel good inside because we are in complete harmony and integrity with who we truly are, Love itself.

I enjoy being Love and allowing love to flow through me, or should I say more accurately, allowing myself to flow with the energy of my Source, the Love within me. Sometimes, it feels like my stomach and chest is being tickled with mirth and laughter. So much joy, love and wonder flow through me. I feel expansive, clear, peaceful, safe, powerful, free, playful, soft, happy, compassionate and kind, all at the same time. It is truly an amazing and glorious feeling!

My journey to love hasn't been all rosy and sweet. Yet, during this journey (still on it), I have grown wiser, clearer, healthier, happier, and freer. I have many friends and teachers, physical and non-physical, along the way, and all have helped me come to learn to trust, to love, to honor and to recognize the love that I truly am as well as to see the love that we all are and surrounded by.

One of my biggest A-ha moments was to realize that at each moment, I have the freedom to accept my Soul and Life's invitation to resonate with Love and Light, or to decline it. For quite some time, I struggled with that, believing that it would be very difficult for me to hold the Love and Light resonance if I still held remaining dark resonance (fear), and that it would take me a long time to build the faith and courage to leave what I was familiar with and plunge ahead to the unknown. It dawned on me later that it really was not as hard as I believed it would be. To be the Love that I am, I was not required to go through such contrast of darkness one moment, and brilliant Light, the next. I had the expansiveness to hold both as I allowed my healing journey from darkness to light. That was such a liberating thought: to allow myself to accept who I am now as I embrace and become the deeper Me. That was one of the cornerstones of my practices of love: accepting myself where I am now and allowing myself to be.

Words don't teach, life does. As I allow myself to be, I am more allowing of others to be as well. When I hold the perception that nobody has to be different (not even myself) for me to feel good, my relationships with others (and with myself) have improved tremendously. It is indeed eye-opening for me to see that the best way for me to be in harmony with others, especially with my loved ones, is for me to be in harmony with Me! When I do that, I can see that I am co-creating peace and harmony!

Inspired by the teachings of Abraham-Hicks, my idea of self-love is to be selfish enough to want to feel good, and to allow myself to feel good by choosing to maintain my connection with the Source of my well-being. I do this through appreciating, acknowledging, accepting, honoring, respecting, adoring, recognizing the beauty, wonder and goodness in me, in others and in life.

One of my intentions is to walk on this beautiful earth with love and appreciation of life in every moment. I make it my practice to find what is good in me, in others, in life and in everything. Sometimes, I find it difficult to do so. In these cases, I remember that these challenges are life's invitation for me to remember to resonate with Love again.

When I adore, accept and appreciate, I experience not only this warm glowy feeling inside me, I also feel full and filled with abundant well-being. We all can connect to our Inner Source of well-being and powerful love. We all can experience the wonderful and delicious feeling of being Love itself! It begins with appreciating ourselves, the one person whom we are with 24/7.

May you discover, enjoy and bask in the joy and beauty of the Love that you truly are!

A BLESSING


by John O'Donohue






May the light of your soul guide you.

May the light of your soul bless the work

You do with the secret love and warmth of your heart.

May you see in what you do the beauty of your own soul.

May the sacredness of your work bring healing, light and renewal to those

Who work with you and to those who see and receive your work.

May your work never weary you.

May it release within you wellsprings of refreshment, inspiration and excitement.

May you be present in what you do.

May you never become lost in the bland absences.

May the day never burden you.

May dawn find you awake and alert, approaching your new day with dreams,

Possibilities and promises.

May evening find you gracious and fulfilled.

May you go into the night blessed, sheltered and protected.

May your soul calm, console and renew you